heartbreak;

it’s sudden.
the ground beneath you gives way,

and you are floating, weightless
but also
                 heavy
                                                   and sinking
                                                                                like a stone
you question;
what you did wrong
why you’re not worth
the time
the effort
and
the patience

to be loved?


the journey back from theirs is
                                                                                                                        torturous. a route you’ll never take again;
filled with memories
around every corner and
on every road

a street you walked down
hand in hand
a tree you kissed under
the museum you visited together

on and on and on and on and on and on

together.
you think about how
these places once meant nothing.



as you get home
exhausted
drained
and dehydrated
from all the tears you shed, perfectly positioned
in a trail that leads back to them -
you take a shower;
an effort to wash away their touch
the feeling of their skin -
replacing their warmth
with the usually unbearable burn of water,
which reddens your skin.

you never realised
how they slowly had crept
into your world

in the form of postcards,
dried flowers
stones
books
that weren’t there before them

it’ll be a few days,
you’ll keep finding
reminiscence

and all you’ll want to do is be held by them.
                   healing;
      but you know all it takes is time.
you know that,
eventually
with the love and patience
that only you can give yourself
you will shed
the sorrow
and grow with strength into
who you once were.

for now,
delicately placed purple kisses -
still on your skin,
only serve as a cruel reminder
of their
gently fading
love

you know they’ll disappear
and you’ll be left once again
with a porcelain collarbone
and a hope,

a promise;
that just as your body has healed,
you shall too.

 Author  |

Antonina Ross

 topic on  |

HEARTBREAK

 section  |

MIND

HEARTBREAK

2019

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